I was at the grocery store the day before Thanksgiving. As you can imagine, the store was packed and the checkout lines were long. While I stood in line, a man passed me with one item in his cart. He noticed the line, muttered an expletive and handed the lone item to an employee, leaving his cart where he stood.
Was the shopper overly unkind? It’s not like he berated the employee for the long line or made him feel any less because of it. The situation could’ve been worse. It also could’ve been a whole lot better.
You’ll hear some say that kindness is free. Although it can be free from a monetary perspective, it’s far from free when money isn’t added into the equation. Kindness can often take extra effort and time away from your day. Helping your friend move into a new apartment, drive him or her to pick up a car out of state or bake a cake for someone you care about. These are all acts of kindness, acts that many of us do on a daily, weekly or monthly basis.
Using the opening example, how much effort would it have taken for the man to place the item back and return the cart himself? Not much, yet, he chose the path of least resistance. His frustration dictated his actions. I have no idea how the employee either did or didn’t allow this to effect his day. He could either feel slighted, taking it out on the next person he interacted with or rise above it, choosing kindness when presented with the opportunity to help others.
Kindness comes easily to some people. I’m sure you’ve heard the expression, “he/she is an angel walking among us.” This would describe someone who goes out of their way to help others on a routine basis. It’s a calling, either instilled in them through a belief in God or desire to help their fellow man. Whatever it may be, being overly kind comes easy to them. That’s not necessarily the case with the rest of us.
Case in point. It’s Friday night and you’re ready to have a relaxing weekend. Your plans consist of sitting on the couch binge watching the latest Netflix series. You’ve had a hard week and you don’t feel like socializing with anyone other than your dog. Then the phone rings. Your best friend asks you to help him take his washer and dryer to the dump in the morning. This is the last thing you expected or wanted to do as part of your relaxing weekend.
When faced with this situation, you can either choose to help, make up a lie to get out of it or refuse altogether because you don’t want to. If you choose the latter, you’ll most likely not have a logbook of friends to count on when you have a favor that needs to be done. Your only real options are to help or lie/excuse your way out of the situation. Lying is never a good option. You’re left with helping, in the end, you’re left with kindness.
We can focus on the negative aspect of this as the logical choice or we can choose to focus on the positive. You’re helping your friend with a task they otherwise wouldn’t have been able to do on their own. That friend asked you to help, which means you’re most likely trustworthy, reliable or perhaps even kind to begin with. Rather than see it as a burden, you could choose to view it as a privilege.
The holidays present us with an abundance of opportunities to choose kindness. This includes more than handing over your money to the charity of your choice. Charities are worthy causes of course, but you can choose random acts of kindness as well. The feeling you receive for helping far outweighs any cost that may be associated with it.
Now that we’ve established acts of kindness are a good thing, what are you doing next Friday night? I could use some help hanging my Christmas lights.
